Wednesday, 22 May 2019

ON WHY WE NEED TO DITCH 'PERFECT'

With my sand-filled feet, I sprinted from one big umbrella to another because the sand was boiling! It was around 12 noon that mum and dad decided to go back indoors. Gab and myself decided to stay by the beach. "I'll just go to the other side to rest and take it {this beauty} all in." I told Gab. He obliged. I wasn't aware he took this exact photo. He always does. He loves candid and stolen shots. I think it's both a gift and a curse (believe me, some shots are hilariously ugly too!). It was when we were sitting in the air plane that I discovered most of the pictures.

The scene {above} is lovely, almost perfect.


BUT. There's always a big BUT, isn't it? If you only knew what happened days before in the background. Yes, this whole fa├žade is beautiful and amazing but there are so many untold stories behind this. Like, I was throwing up and had the worst migraine on my best friend's wedding. That I needed to take antibiotics days ago because my fever and infection won't go away. That for some reason my laptop had water spillage on its screen and I'm not sure if this is covered by my insurance. I don't mean to list all these unfortunate events but the point is...

Looking at one picture makes us believe that everything is perfect. But we all know nothing is. Here are some reasons why we need to let go of the idea of 'perfect':

#1 PERFECT IS A UNICORN
Have you ever heard someone saying: "I have arrived! I am perfect!" Chances are, you haven't. Why? Because people are flawed and we all have our strengths and weaknesses. The uphill strive to proverbial 'arrival' will not happen because like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, there's no such thing. 

#2 THE ROAD TO BEING PERFECT IS TIRING
Since 'perfect' does not exist, we can wear ourselves out but we will never find it. We only have one life and if we waste it trying to be perfect, we won't have time to enjoy it. While we can't achieve perfection, we can be consistent. Yes, that's the antidote to perfectionism: consistency. You can try again tomorrow if you fail today.

#3 'PERFECT' DOES NOT LOVE COMPANY
Kristine, if you're going to fail, fail faster! That's one of the things my favourite boss told me. And as if I didn't get the picture he inserted another anecdote. Kiss as many frogs as you can. One of them will become prince but you have to kiss them now! I'm smiling as I write this post because in hindsight, it all made sense no matter how laughable those quotes are. You see, I was a recovering perfectionist too. I have a specific motion picture of love story in my head, only problem is, it never happened. Something far better did! Relevant read, HERE.

#4 RATHER THAN BEING PERFECT, CELEBRATE LIFE
Since our time is finite and we'll be here only once, it's a good use of our lives to maximise happiness, don't you think? That's my theme for my wedding: DITCH PERFECT. I don't want 'the' perfect wedding. My ultimate goal is to celebrate it with my loved ones. I want a structured yet relatively stress free one, as much as we can. I don't care if nobody remembers how impeccable my wedding gown is, but I'll appreciate if somebody will recall them having a good laugh with us on our wedding.

#5 TO LET GO OF PERFECT IS TO BE FREE
A big, round, from-the-belly-up exhale. A weigh off my shoulders. That's what I felt when I finally made peace with myself. I can't have that Victoria's Secret body but I can be healthy and happy in my own pace. I may not have  Mr. Perfect (again if there's such a man) but Gab is beyond perfect, he loves me and that's more than enough. I may not have the world's greatest job (what should it be, I wonder?) but I'm grateful that I have a good working environment (Hello, M! She's my favourite person at work).

Writing all of these makes me think, who needs perfect when you can be content and happy? -CMK
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